justonetruth | Locked to Deaduction

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Locked to Deaduction

It took a bit of searching, but Conan managed to find it. He knew his alternate had been looking for some sort of study or perhaps library to 'haunt.' After that, it was just finding which study was most likely the sort for him to haunt.

The one with the little shrine was pretty much a dead give away.

Since their last encounter, he'd been worried about his other's fate. So here he was, waiting. His other would return eventually.

If he was still around.

He just had to determine when it was too long and really starting to fear the worse.

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"It really will." And happiness was definitely something that Ran deserved.

The ghost didn't argue that. He knew that had been a mistake almost immediately, and well -- while he might not admit defeat in front of most others, it was hard to argue with himself.

But for his other to be saying that -- warning him against pushing too far ... Shinichi looked up in sudden suspicion. His counterpart trusted him that much? No -- cared that much? "I understand. And I definitely agree. I -- trust you." More perhaps than he trusted himself.

"We'll have to make up a story of why she was gone so long though," Conan said with a nervous laugh. "Ten months is hard to explain away."

He quirked an eyebrow at the look, tilting his head. "What's with the suspicious look then?" He asked. "I said I'd help and I won't go against my word unless I have good reason too."

"You'll think of something." There was absolute certainty in that; Shinichi had no doubt that his counterpart could manage it.

"No, I'm --" Shinichi shook his head, unable somehow to meet his counterpart in the eyes. "I wasn't sure how you'd react," he said. "Once I'd recovered enough to think about it. But I never thought -- I wasn't sure you'd let me again," he finished quietly, looking up to meet his counterpart's gaze seriously. "This is more than I deserve."

"Heh. I'm sure we can," Conan said. After all, Ran was there too to help.

"You deserve time to do what you need to and having time wasted here isn't fair. No harm was done, so there's no reason to hold it against you as long as you don't try it again consciously," Conan said, smiling at his counterpart sincerely.

That sincerity --

Shinichi felt something nameless slip away from him. He let it go without protest, marvelling at how sharper things seemed, as though something had come into focus suddenly. "Thank you," he said. "But not now, I think. There's something -- something I need to get straight first."

"Probably for the best. Doing that after talking about bad memories is begging for me to let something slip," Conan said.

That and the fact it ALWAYS took forever to suppress those darker thoughts after getting such a strong reminder, but he didn't want to guilt trip the other.

"Did something else happen?"

Shinichi's grimace might have indicated that he guessed some of what his counterpart was thinking, but his expression quickly turned very serious.

"Yes. Yes, something did."

Conan wouldn't react to the grimace. He wasn't going to confirm anything about that.

"What is it? Did you meet with Ran again?"

Shinichi shook his head. "There's a -- Kid here. He's not Kid. 1412."

He really doesn't want to explain further, but he can't not tell. "I realised he was off, didn't realise -- didn't want to realise, maybe -- just how off. He's insane. His mind -- it's all over the place. Stabbing sort of instinct, dragging you down, turning on itself -- It's too much."

Conan was silent for several moments at that. "...insane, huh?" Sad to say, the possibility was not an impossibility in his mind. It had been ever since he found out Kaito got himself Demon Sealed.

Out of control. Violent. Completely engulfed by one sin. As much as he wanted to avoid it, the possibility was there Kaito would be overcome by it.

"What kind of insane? How dangerous is he?"

"Very." The ghost really didn't want to risk his hard-won stability by remembering 1412's mind, but he forced himself to think back. "Killing's not -- it's a need. Says he needs a contract but the contract is what he wants it to be. I didn't give him one and he took it anyway."

Conan frowned, index and thumb holding his chin as he thought this over. "...he needs justification," Conan said. "He enjoys stealing, no matter what he says, and he does it without his conscience getting to him because it's for the 'greater good.'" He theorized. "This one needs to be doing a service to do it, but it's an addiction, so the rules will be bent."

"It's no service." The ghost scowled. "He knew those were mine and he took them anyway."

"What exactly did he think the contract was?" Conan asked.

The ghost is silent a moment before replying. He doesn't like how easily he was tricked, less admitting that to another. "We were playing a game. 20 questions," he explains. "1412 who wouldn't I kill. I didn't trust him with that answer so he changed it to who I would -- and then announced he had a contract when I replied."

"And what was your reply?" Conan asked, his expression not changing. It was a calm, calculating look.

"Gin. Vodka. The rest of them." Shinichi's unsure what his counterpart will make of this admission. A way to measure how much he's changed?

Conan was silent for a long, long time after that. "Would it be so bad...if he fulfilled that?" It was said in a low voice. Just loud enough to be heard.

"Stopping the organisation is what is keeping Haibara and I here," Shinichi said immediately. "If that's taken from us ... " He really didn't want to contemplate the effect that would have on Haibara.

"...keeping you sane? Or just here?" Conan asked.

"Here and grounded," Shinichi said firmly. Sane was -- a loaded word right now.

"What happens...when they're gone?" Conan asked.

"I'm not sure -- not exactly. Because it's not just them, it's us too -- they call it unfinished business because we have to finish it. If we don't ..." Shinichi shrugged. "There's the chance we'll just be here with nothing to keep us focused."

"So, you have to be the one to do it?" Conan asked.

"I don't know if that's true," Shinichi hesitated. "But if we're not involved, it'll be harder to feel like we can let go, I think." They were going by instinct.

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