justonetruth | (no subject)

[And now he's giving him a flat and vaguely amused look]

I'm sorry, I must have spent too much time in the chemistry lab. [His words are dripping with sarcams]

The where?

[Something is very very very wrong.]

[a beat]

... it was a joke, you're supposed to laugh. [Then again he had never been really good with jokes]

[He's not amused. Very not amused. It might be slightly more frightening than a normal Hakuba's disapproval.]

You've never been any good with jokes.

[He stalks up to the human, reaches out to touch Kaito on the side of the face.]

[... well that's one thing he and this Hakuba's Kaito have in common.

Though when the blond steps forward and reaches out, Kaito's first instinct is to back away. Which he does]

Oi oi, what are you trying?

Checking something.

[He steps forward again, and grabs for Kaito's wrist, slightly faster than a human version of himself would have been able to move.]

Don't struggle and it won't hurt.

[He's still backing away, and the only reason he's caught is because his Hakuba isn't this fast or persistent]

H-hey! Back off! [And he pulls against the Doctor's grip-- hard]

[He doesn't let go. Barely even moves.

Kaito will now feel someone poking through his mind and memories.]

[Oh wow, this is creepy. And that's saying something, Kaito has encountered some pretty creepy stuff in his career as Kaitou Kid. And he thought having a stalker Hakuba was bad enough. This one can read minds?

Another tug at his wrist, harder this time]

I didn't say you could do that. [There's no panic. There's never any panic, not with that infamous poker face. But there is sheer annoyance]

[He lets go, and it's obvious he's letting go, instead of it being as a result of Kaito's actions.]

I suppose it's an alternate history. Though my presence in it is rather unusual.

[a flat look]

I could have told you that. Then again, doing so right off the bat would have ruined my chances of messing with you.

[Well, those chances have been ruined already. He rubs his wrist, looking at Hakuba warily as he takes another step back]

I doubt you're going to be able to mess with me very well.

[A pause, a question.]

Am I really that incompetent as a human?

[Kaito Kuroba never thought he'd see the day were Saguru Hakuba (or a lookalike) would admit to his own incompetence]

You're not that bad. Just annoying.

[Half to himself, muttering.]

No, it wasn't that.

Personality was a bit different, but...

[Turning back to Kuroba, addressing him.]

I was human. That's very strange.

[a shrug]

I... guess? [not that he really thinks being human is weird, but now he's regarding the Doctor with a curious look]

[A nod, ignoring Kuroba's expression.]

I'm not usually human. It would take a great deal of difference in the time-stream to make me human, or to have a human version of me.

[eyebrow]

What are you then? [okay, he'll bite]

Well, there are humans, and there are aliens. Since I'm not a human, let's see what your brilliant mind comes up with.

[There's a slight pause as he thinks, and when he speaks again, it is in a complete (and very serious) deadpan]

Giant cow monster.

[A sudden flash of a grin, Kaito was always amusing.]

Fantastic. I suppose you don't need any more information then.

Did you come here in a giant milk-carton shaped space ship? I bet you did. Was it chocolate or soy? I hope it was chocolate because everyone knows that's the superior flavor of milk.

I'd better go tell the Prime Minister we're being invaded.

[Mind you all of this is said completely and utterly tongue-in-cheek]

Edited 2010-01-12 20:46 (UTC)

Chocolate, yes.

[A pause, consideration, then pulls out and flips open his pocket-watch. Annoyance, shaking it once or twice before he clicks it shut and puts it away.]

Who would the current prime minister be? I'm rather out-of-date at the moment.

Depends on what country you're talking about. I meant Japan, and his name is Yukio Hatoyama.

[A moment of thought.]

Early 2010's then?

Good guess!

[eyes him knowingly]

Time traveler?